Monday, February 15,
2016
I am writing this the day after Valentine Day and in the
past 24 hours I feel I have graduated to being a truly dominant woman who is
the leader in a female-led relationship, and my husband has embraced is place
being subservient to me, at least for the next three-month trial period, and I
have a feeling it is going to last much longer.
On Saturday night, Ross was serving me orally, which has become a much
more customary since we began exploring a female-led relationship. While he pleasured me, I asked him if he was
really committed to a relationship in which I was in control in all ways. In that moment he couldn’t have agreed any
faster. I reminded him he has repeatedly
challenged me to “take it to the next level.”
I told him if he was serious, I wanted us to go through a kind of
commitment ceremony on Valentine Day.
His curiosity was piqued beyond compare.
I set the ground rules for the ceremony and he agreed that he would
comply with everything I asked/required of him, during the ceremony, and make
and keep any promises I required of him for our three-month FLR trial. For the rest of the night he tried to get me
to reveal more information about the commitment ceremony, but I gave him no
answers. In fact, I had only a vague
idea of how the ceremony would unfold because my friend, Angela had decided to
be the “producer” of a role play situation that would require Ross to
demonstrate his commitment to submitting to me through a legal contract, AND leaving
Ross with the belief that it was all real.
Our commitment ceremony was scheduled to be the conclusion
of a lunch Angela hosted at her house.
In addition to Angela, Ross, and myself, there were two other
guests. One was a tall, simultaneously
beautiful and mature looking woman, dressed in casual business attire. She had an expensive-looking cream colored blazer
buttoned over a lacey camisole, (It was over 80 degrees here yesterday) and
wore jeans with red heels. Her hair was gray
throughout and cut in an unbalanced bob.
Her red lipstick matched her shoes and expensively manicured nails. Angela introduced her to us as the attorney
who had prepared the relationship contract we would sign that afternoon. (Although he said nothing, Ross definitely
had a reaction to the announcement we would be “signing a relationship
contract.”). The “attorney” introduced
the second guest as her assistant who needed to join us to notarize the
contract. She was a shorter,
curly-haired woman who appeared even older than the “lawyer,” but also had a
worldly presence. She said little
throughout the afternoon but took a few notes during the lunch.
The lunch was cherry/chicken salad with iced tea. The weather was so hot, it felt like summer,
but not so hot that we couldn’t enjoy having the French doors open out to
Angela’s beautiful back yard. It was an
enjoyable lunch conversation led mostly by the “attorney” and Angela, who are obviously
long time friends, who discussed their travels over the Christmas
holidays. Ross was absolutely silent,
barely making eye contact with anyone, until the “attorney” asked him directly
how he liked submitting to me. She asked
the question in a very conversational, even friendly way, but he couldn’t
muster an answer and looked at me to save him.
Before either of us responded, the attorney continued, saying to Ross,
“you must like submitting to her if you are going to agree to everything that
is in this contract I prepared for the two of you to sign.” She then turned the conversation in a
different direction, leaving Ross to contemplate what was in the contract.
When the lunch was finished, Angela invited all the women to
join her on the back deck for a drink and asked Ross to clear the table. When he had finished that task he came to the
doorway leading to the deck, announced he was finished with his task and asked
if there was anything else that needed to be done. Angela dismissed him to sit in the dining
room to wait for us, but gave me an approving look, which made me very proud of
him.
After about 20 minutes, the attorney directed us to all
return to the dining room and find seats around the dining table. She had Ross and I sit on either side of her
with a pile of official looking papers in front of her. She explained in a very serious manner that
while some people thought the type of contract we were enacting was frivolous,
it is actually very serious and legally binding. (I know that it isn’t, and Ross may discover
it is not legally binding, but the point of this role play was to make him
believe it is real. At this point, he
seems to be accepting our femdom contract is legally binding.)
The attorney then provided each of us with a copy of the
contract, but made clear to Ross that he was the one making all the agreements
in exchange for my accepting him as my submissive. She asked him if he understood what he was
agreeing to and if he was ready to enact the contract. He agreed he was and the attorney then
started through the provisions of the contract requiring each of us to initial
each item individually.
The contract started with an introductory paragraph defining
female-led relationships. The second
paragraph was a description of my responsibilities as the female leader of our
relationship, and specifically identified my responsibilities including being
the benevolent supervisor of Ross’ life, with the final authority on all
decisions in our married life or in Ross’ individual life, including as examples
small and large, having the authority and potentially deciding when he would be
allowed to urinate, or deciding if and when he would commence feminizing
hormone therapy. The third paragraph
described Ross’ general standing in our relationship as the subservient party
and was followed with a list of specific requirements, each of which Ross was
required to initial. Days ago I had
given Angela a list of things I would like to see in the contract and I was
curious to see how many of my requests would be included. The contract requirements (in less legally
technical jargon) are:
1.
Ross will
be allowed a maximum of two orgasms from February 14 to May 22, 2016. Neither of which is guaranteed, and both to
be determined by me. One may occur on
his birthday, April 2, and another on any day of my choosing. If my decision is to not permit him an orgasm
on his birthday, that will not result in a total of more than one orgasm for
the duration of the trial (until May 22).
2.
Before February 22 (next Monday), Ross must
receive a full-body waxing and must maintain his body hair-free until May 22.
3.
Ross agrees to relinquish control of all the
money he earns from now through May 22.
Ross will carry one credit card for emergencies only, and may only use
it with my permission secured through text or voice message. By mutual agreement I will remove all our
income (both his and mine) from a jointly controlled account to which we each
have access, and place it in an account over which I have sole control.
4.
Ross will acknowledge, through the execution of
the contract, my authority over all decision-making in our lives, including our
use of free time. That is not to say
that I will dictate how Ross spends all his time, but if I choose to, he agrees
that I MAY dictate how he uses any of his time.
5.
In addition to generally agreeing to my authority
over his time, Ross acknowledges that his role in our intimate relationship is
SOLELY for the purpose of providing me with pleasure and that all our intimate
interaction will be for my pleasure. He
will acknowledge and accept that any sexual satisfaction he experiences will be
coincidental.
6.
Ross agrees to enter into psychotherapy, commencing
by March 11, to determine if he is diagnosably transgender and to explore his
desire to transition.
7.
Ross agrees to receive a Prince Albert piercing,
and will travel with me directly from the commitment ceremony to a piercing
appointment, to receive the piercing.
8.
Ross will be required to develop a written
pledge of his subservience to me. The
first draft of this written pledge will be provided to me by February 26.
At the conclusion of Ross’ initials being applied to each
contract provision, the “attorney” had us each sign both copied of the
initialed contract. The “attorney’s” aid
the applied an official compression stamp/seal to both contracts, and signed
the seal. The attorney gave us one
signed copy and placed the other contract copy in a folder that she said would
be placed in a safe in her office. She
told us that ordinarily the contract would be recorded to make it legally
binding, but because contracts of this sort were commonly extended and modified
after the trial period, keeping a copy would streamline that process in
May. She warned Ross that if he did not
abide by any of the requirements of the contract, I could notify her office and
she would file the contract making it enforceable.
Thursday, February
17, 2016
This is a follow-up to our commitment ceremony, that
occurred on Sunday, Valentine’s Day.
Ross and I went directly from the ceremony to a tattoo/piercing shop I
had previously investigated. Although
extremely anxious (both of us), Ross withstood the piercing quite well. It looked like it would hurt horribly to me,
but Ross’ reaction indicated it was not that bad. I have learned to recognize when Ross is in
“sub space,” and since Sunday, almost any interaction I initiate between us
reminding him of his subservient status, pushes him in the direction of “sub
space.” When I started exploring this
lifestyle some months ago, it was a partly exciting and partly unnerving
fantasy. I cannot believe how much my
feelings have changed. I don’t think
there is any way I can backtrack from this new way of relating to one another,
and it seems Ross agrees.